I have a refined palate for all things gaudy and sometimes even gauche. And that’s how my lovely (to me) Clive came to be. I spied a duck toilet paper holder placed in between the housewares and hunting section. Actually there were several including a bear and a deer but the duck really spoke to me. I realized that these were set out in the perfect position to catch rednecks… product placement genius. But since I’m hardly redneck and more an elegant hillbilly I had to give my TP holder a fresh coat of gold and a name. Clive, named after an actor I will not name here, was born that day and put into service quickly after.
And then I started to see these Quilted Northern Designed to be Forgotten videos, directed by Academy Award nominee Bennett Miller that are hilarious btdub…
And it dawned on me… I have a bathroom object much like Daddy Gator and Conductor Randy. Yes, my poor dutiful Clive has a particularly dirty job. Placed in the bathroom, right across from the toilet, Clive sees things that most eyeballs should not have to witness.
This room has seen some quite a few atrocities. The time a pair of little boy’s underwear was flushed down the commode and fished out… that’s something we’d all like to scrape away from our eyeballs. The time my nose decided to explode after a shower and I got blood everywhere because I wigged hardcore… seriously looked like a crime scene. And last, but not least my dad. Naked. Nobody got time for that :)
And Clive has been there through it all watching and waiting for the moment when his services are needed. Just like those funny videos, Quilted Northern works so well people can forget their bathroom experience, but poor, dutiful Clive can never forget. #HelpMeForget